Dec 15, 2005

Confessions of an Airbrushed Anglophile

A veddy British Madonna wants to keep it bloody real

Source: Houston Press
Written By Brian McManus & Annie Zaleski

So, ok, maybe Madonna doesn’t like Photoshop

Throughout her ever-changing incarnations — Material Girl, religious provocateur, dominatrix, crypt keeper — one thing Madonna has remained is honest.

Whether she’s hitchhiking naked, exploring Jewish mysticism or feeling super duper about her Mini Cooper, Mama M has never had a problem telling the American public exactly what she’s thinking.

We know her kids aren’t allowed to watch TV or read magazines. She loves Michael Moore, hates Dubya and wanted to suck off Antonio Banderas before anyone stateside knew who he was. She was a teetotaling vegetarian. Now she bellies up to the bar for a pint and a burger. We’ve been with her through both. She rides horses. And falls off them. The woman is a walking, talking advertising campaign for herself. If she does it, thinks it or believes it, we, praise red-thread bracelets, will know.

So now that Madonna is unhappy, it’s no surprise we’re starting to hear about it. Her current source of discontent? The December 1 issue of Rolling Stone. Featuring Ms. Lucky Star arching catlike toward the camera, the cover makes her look nothing short of stunning.

What’s the problem, you ask?

“It’s all a bloody farce,” she’s been blurting in thick Cockney outside various pubs in England, according to sources.

Nigel Pepperworth, owner and pint puller at the popular central London Pepperworth Pub, says Madge came in the day the issue hit shelves. “She was right mad. She brought it in and started waving it about after her third pint of Bass. She was going on about airbrushing and Photoshop touch-ups and whatnot. I couldn’t really understand a bloody word she was saying actually. Her faux-Brit accent gets fuckin’ right thick after a coupla ales. She’s from Michigan; why the fuck she talk like that?”

Read entire article

Read an earlier PSN story on Madonna, Ok, at least Madonna likes Photoshop

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